INBOX ⦿ EDGE OF REVERIE

[gunmettle]

INBOX

"This is Juzo Inui. Leave a message."

voice • text • action

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[gunmettle]

[ INSTANTLY looks away. His barrel feels hot.

This had better be a short walk or he's not going to make it. ]

The sun's not even out.

1/2

[retroductions]

[Wow you really know how to flatter a lady, Juzo.]

…Then all the more impressive that you cast a shade at all!

[retroductions]

Why don’t you tell me a bit about yourself?

[gunmettle]

[ Somehow the roleplaying makes this a million times worse. ]

You fir-- uh. Ladies first.

[ AN ATTEMPT WAS MADE. ]

[retroductions]

[He trusts in your ability to adapt, sir. What a valiant attempt!]

Oh, me? [He chuckles lightly.] I'm something of a performer. A contralto singer!

Have you ever been to an opera, Mr Inui?

[gunmettle]

[ God, this is so stupid!! Maybe he'd have an easier time if he stopped thinking about this as what it literally is and started thinking about it more like a job.

That takes some of the edge off. Enough that he's able to look down again. ]

Can't say I have. Guy like me tends to stick out in highbrow places like that.

[retroductions]

[Sholmes senses a slight shift — not quite enough for Juzo to be completely comfortable, but enough to continue a conversation without too much issue. That is the point, after all; and if he puts whatever technique he’s using into practice, no doubt he’ll acclimate in no time at all.

Maybe.]

But I think “a guy like you” would look very handsome in a finely-tailored suit. I can just imagine it.

[gunmettle]

[ Maybe is right. Whatever little bit of composure he's managed to gather falters for a second. ]

I-- I'm not really one for dressin' up fancy.

[ Besides, he has a bad habit of destroying his clothes. ]

[retroductions]

["Irene" grins daintily, a little mysteriously.]

Oh, I don't know. I think I could find you something very fitting.

[The parasol twirls again as he guides them across the beach.]

Speaking of very fitting, would you like to hear a secret, Mr Inui?

[Yes, he's going to squeeze an Echidna quest into this date, fight him.]

[gunmettle]

[ Oh, that smile is entirely unfair. He glances back at Sholmes in time to catch it and glances away again just as quickly.

Even pretending this is a job isn't helping him as much as he'd hoped it would. ]

I suppose so?

[ He doesn't sound very sure of that. ]

1/2

[retroductions]

[Under the pretense of sharing a secret, what is a lady to do? Sholmes leans in closer, of course, unhooking their arms just long enough to cup a hand to the side of his face, whispering conspiratorially.]

Well, it may be improper for me to share, but I feel as though I am safe in telling you. While I was getting dressed for our outing today, I found myself in a very difficult predicament. This dress was built for a certain... body type, shall we say. One that is fuller in certain areas of which I am not naturally inclined.

[The boobs. He's talking about the boob area.]

So I conjured up a trick to make the fabric fit a little more snugly. Do you want to know what it was?

[Sholmes leans in even more, smile tilting up at the corners.]

[retroductions]

[And then, blandly, in his own tone of voice:]

I stuffed a pair Miss Jiang Yanli's steamed buns down the front of my dress. One on each side. I am walking about with food beneath these fabrics, Mr Juzo, so that the garment does not droop while we walk. Please appreciate the lengths I will go to for your sake.

1/

[gunmettle]

[ Hopefully they've stopped walking, but either way, Juzo stops dead in his tracks the instant Sholmes leans in to whisper at him, and-- ]

[gunmettle]

[ OH HE UNDERSTANDS WHAT SHOLMES IS TALKING ABOUT ]

[gunmettle]

[ WHY HE FUCK IS HE TELLING HIM--- ]

[gunmettle]

done

[gunmettle]

HERLOCK YOU DUMBASS, I DIDN'T WANT YOU TO DO ANY OF THIS IN THE FIRST PLACE!!

[retroductions]

[WOW!! Sholmes just looks shocked, reeling back.]

You cannot say that to a lady’s face! And while you are on a date, at that! I will pretend poor Ms Adler did not hear this incivility from you!

[gunmettle]

I'm sayin' it to your face!

[retroductions]

But you may as well be saying it to her with your body language. Honestly!

[HOOKS THEIR ARMS TOGETHER AGAIN]

This is for your own good, so steel yourself! Irene will be returning in a few seconds’ time, and she will be inclined to lean her lovely head against your shoulder as your beachside trek continues onward. I may as well warn you about it now!

[gunmettle]

[ TAKES HIS ARM BACK ]

Would you stop it?! This isn't helping anything!

[retroductions]

[Stubborn as he is, Sholmes just continues to hold his arm out expectantly.]

I admit that it utterly confounds me to guess at what you could be so afraid of. Do you think I will bite? Or try to suddenly ravage you in the sand? This is but a short, mildly flirtatious stroll.

[gunmettle]

I'm not afraid! I just---

[ UGH. He feels so stupid for this whole thing. ]

It makes me uncomfortable. Always has. I appreciate what you're tryin' to do for me, but it's not gonna change anything.

[retroductions]

[He’s silent for a moment, before nearly sighing and dropping his arm back to his side.]

And if it were Herlock Sholmes asking to take your arm instead of Irene Adler, would the result be the same?

[His brain is trying to tweak and pry at the variables here. Trying to tease out a compromise.]

[gunmettle]

[ He visibly hesitates. ]

I don't know.

What's this matter to you, anyway?